You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending

It’s nice to know that you were there,
So thanks for acting like you cared

I think Avril said it pretty well. The end of a relationship is so very sad, but there is still all of those “things” there, those things you share, those things that made you, you. I don’t normally post twice in a day, but since I reblogged, I thought I would go ahead and go for broke! I was watching a show (If you love Debra Messing and you have not yet caught The Mysteries of Laura, I suggest to check it out immediately!) and the main character is having a bit of a crisis of love. She has divorced her ex because he cheated on her and is dating someone new. She’s torn because she works with her ex and sees how he cares for her in the little things and the big ones (they share 5 year old twins). At the end of this particular episode, her father says to her, “Let yourself be happy.”

I’ve said many times that I believe cheating on someone would be a deal-breaker, for me and for the hubbs. That being said, there is so much history and love and a million other things to consider. Especially for someone in a forever relationship, you don’t just throw away your life and your love for a mistake. Don’t get me wrong, cheating is a mistake, a serious mistake. It isn’t a fleeting moment. It doesn’t just “happen.” No you don’t trip, fall, and land in each others privates (thanks Eminem). You make a conscious decision to go be with someone other than your SO and that’s a big deal. The reason it touched me so when the father says to her to let herself be happy was this….. What if we hold ourselves back from being happy because we won’t allow ourselves to get past this thing, this thing we believe to be so horrible there is no coming back from?

Therefore, I encourage you, don’t live a disposable life with a disposable relationship. Live an awesome life with a forever relationship. Everyone makes mistakes. Sometimes people make horrible, heart-wrenching, feel like you’re at the point of no return mistakes. But, mistakes can be forgiven if you want to forgive. If you’re willing to be the change you hope to see in the marriage (Ghandi-esqe). No matter how difficult it is to admit, there are two people in a relationship and you’re responsible for at least 50% of the problems.

Boy, isn’t that a hard pill to swallow?

 

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