I’ve recently seen a few posts about how people are so sick of dating and not finding “the one.” I’m sure you’ve heard people say, stop looking, and that’s when it will find you. This might sound cliche but it is so very true. I’ve talked about how the hubbs and I met online. Not like eHarmony, I was playing canasta with a “friend” in a yahoo game room. He lived in Washington State, around 3,000 miles from me.She said this friend of mine just came in and he’s super hot, you should check him out. Naturally, I check him out, agreed with her assessment, and the rest is history.
However, about six months before that, I was dating someone for whom I cared a great deal. He had been severely abused by his father and, afraid to become that, chose to not have children. I already had my oldest two, now 22 and 20, and he was fantastic with them and they adored him. He felt that one day I would want to have another child. I told him I was happy with my children. If I married someone that wanted another child, I might entertain the idea (hence my 11 year old), but it certainly wasn’t a pre-requisite. Not only did he “decide” to break up with me, but he did it by cheating on me and making sure I found out about it. It was pretty low. I swore off men and dating, deciding to concentrate on raising my two kids, then around 5 and 7, and going to school to get my Bachelor degree. Shortly after, of course, I met the hubbs.
After he moved to Memphis, TN, where I was attending school, 3 months later, we went to lunch one day. Now, before this, the last I had heard of the ex was that he went back to Las Vegas, where he was from, and that was that. So, when I walked into a restaurant where we were having lunch, while the hubbs parked the car, and saw the ex, you could have knocked me over with a feather. The story of my life: He realized he’d made a terrible mistake and was sorry. It was so great too see me, then the hubbs walked in behind me and his mouth (the ex) dropped to the floor. I don’t think it’s TOO terribly petty of me to say, it was a pretty great moment. The point, of course, is that just because your relationship ends and you think it is just the worst thing that could have ever happened, doesn’t mean that one day you won’t be extremely happy it did. Although, at the time my heart was completely broken. Then, came along to person to heal it.
Also, when you’re always on the same “page” relationship-wise.
It may not have been the man I thought I’d be with. He was better.
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Since I have so desperately missed psychology, I have decided to add tele-therapy sessions to my repertoire and you can find that webpage at Self-Actualization Therapy. It will be more clinical psychology and less personal but I would LOVE to see you all there!!