I know this is going to be a highly charged subject so I want to preface it by saying this: Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Opinions are like assholes, everyone has them. There is dissension on this subjects amongst psychologists as well. I would love to hear your thoughts.

According to Psychology Today, sexologists/psychologists fall into two groups, either believing asexuality exists or attributing this to a low libido or HSDD (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder). One researcher identified a few characteristics that someone who is asexual may portray. These include more women than men are asexual, low self-esteem, lower socioeconomic status, poorer health, anxiety, highly religious, or depression. He contends that some asexual people may masturbate, but not fantasize. They may enjoy hugging and kissing. Some asexual people city they enjoy and/or need control and distancing themselves with sex from their partner avoids the necessity to become vulnerable. Many asexual persons had been sexually active as a teenager and/or young person, but not when they were older.

For these reasons above and the fact that I know people to be sexual beings lead me to decide (for myself) that I do not believe asexual people are truly asexual. I understand the usual arguments and I realize that persons whom identify themselves as asexual do not feel anxiety from “missing out.” However, since the people who identify themselves this way have underlying symptoms, I must think that there are hundreds of hormone imbalances that can occur in our bodies. I know that depression and anxiety, along with the medications used to treat these disorders, can have side effects including a lowered libido. I also know that when a person does not have sex over time the urgency to have sex again diminishes. Can you imagine how diminished you might feel after not having sex for a year? Five? Ten? Sexual trauma is no doubt a huge factor here. Many people who have been abused or attacked when they were younger may have blocked memories. Perhaps this is a portion of persons whom identify themselves as asexual. We know that more women than men have been sexually attacked. It would stand to reason that is why more women than men identify themselves as asexual.


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Anna Levenson-Pintrest